Hello Margie! and secondly, I’d like to bring to your attention a new blogger on the block (well, new to me, anyway), Kenny Wisdom. I popped over to his site after reading his email and ended up staying there until I’d read all of his archives. The guy is, in my eyes, a literary genius. When I wrote ‘I’ve never been more in awe than when I’ve read something truly amazing – a handful of words which have been put together in such a way that it makes my heart stop and my mouth hang open,’ it was words like Kenny’s that I was talking about. Amongst his archives is a play he has written, which I actually read twice. If you don’t do anything else today, check him out.
Right. Now onto much more pressing matters!
Remember I told you about the cat who was sneaking in at night and shitting on my kitchen floor? Well unfortunately, it’s still happening. Each time it happens I wipe it up (notice I used the word 'wipe'), toss it into one of those scented nappy sacks and put it in a bin bag in the garden. I was horrified on Monday when I realised the bin bag was FULL! Can you imagine…an entire black bag full of poop? It’s disgusting, and really brought it home to me how long I’ve been putting up with it. The two ‘cuddly’ cats that used to visit me disappeared off the face of the earth, so I knew it wasn’t them. And then last week I caught the back end of the perpetrator himself just as he was jumping over the garden fence…but not before he turned back to scowl at me. He’s the ugliest, mankiest cat I’ve ever seen, with knotted fur and wonky eyes.
How do I know it’s a ‘he?’ Because a girl would never do something so disgusting.
Anyway, this morning I woke up, ambled downstairs, turned on the kitchen light and saw this.
Yeah, sorry it’s a bit blurry. I figured you’d understand me not staying down there too long.
I was gagging just thinking about clearing it up earlier, so for the moment I’ve left it. It’s so bloody cold out there that I’m hoping it’ll freeze and I’ll be able to stab a fork in it.
Please tell me – somebody, anybody – what can I do? I have a cat flap for my two cats and when they are in the house at night I lock it. It means they have to cross their legs till the morning, but they can deal with that. However, if they’re out when I go to bed and no amount of calling them brings them back, I won’t lock it and leave them outside. It’s minus godknowswhat out there and they’ll freeze their little goolies off. (Well, they would if they still had them.) Somebody suggested a magnetic cat flap with special collars, but my cats won’t keep them on.
I wonder if there’s any kind of product I could buy which would be a deterrent?
I did have a bit of a brainwave. I thought about setting the cat flap so it’ll let the cat in but won’t let him back out again. That way, I can catch the bastard. But what the hell could I do with him once I’d cornered him? I don’t want to hurt him. (Actually, I want to shove a fucking marrow up his arse, but I wouldn’t.)
Any thoughts on how could I frighten him enough so he doesn’t come back… but without being too cruel?
13 comments:
I feel for you, Elaine, i really do. I felt sick just cleaning out Rose's litter tray this morning. But at least she is my pet. No, this is one of the reasons i won't have a cat flap. Its old fashioned opening the door for me. But i know thats all very well if you're at home - its harder if you go to work.
If you are around a lot of the time, why don't you get rid of that cat flap? You must be feeling so ill at clearing up all that shit!
good luck with that xxx
Many years ago when I had a similar issue (a cat using the cat flap to eat my cats food). I set the cat flap so that it only let cats in.
I then cornered the rogue cat, squirted it with a lot of water from a spray bottle, before said cat ran out the front door.
It never came back after that.
At least you don't have skunks in England....
*gagwretchgagwretch*
That is disgusting.
I would say, by the looks of his poo and the description of his appearance, he is sick.
Get your cats inside for the night and set up some sort of live trap for cats in your kitchen or better yet, just outside the door, in front of the kitty flat. Bait it with food or milk and when you've caught him, take him to a vet to be destroyed. I hate the thought of doing that to an animal but he could be contagious and make your cats sick.
In any case, I hope that stops soon 'cause that is GROSS!
Oh God, I know you don't want to hear this but I'd have to shoot the little bugger! I know you won't do that Laney so I agree with Heather's suggestion.
BTW I did tell about my TV and DVD appearances but it was way back in March 2007, you can see it here if you really want to
http://akelamalu.blogspot.com/2007/03/my-claims-to-fame.html
Nice pic Laney...
As the others have said Laney, if you can catch it squirting water can work wonders, unless it's like Belle who actually likes water squirted at her, hence most mornings she can be found in the shower, but thats another story.
You might just have to lock the cat flap for the time being and see if it finds somewhere else to do its business away from you....xx
I think you should lock your cat flap[Ilove that word make's me giggle like a kid]outward only,when SHE.. come's in and is trapped, throw pepper over HER.The next few night's sprinkle pepper just outside the door as a reminder.JOB DONE
That's awful. You must be so pissed off with this. Is there any way you can get rid of the cat flap? Your own cats will find somewhere outside to sit until you let them in - like a bin or the window sill.
My cat does just that as we don't have a cat flap. She sits on the window sill and meows for England.
CJ xx
Yes get rid of the cat flap and keep a water pistol so you can squirt th eofender - they hate water!
The inward only flap, and water-squirting, seems highly sensible to me.
I'd try the water treatment too. Set the catflap so yours and the offender can get in but not out. Then attack the intruder with water canons! I am sure he won't come back.
And now you know why I am not a cat person! I am SO glad I wasn't eating when I saw that picture! Good luck!
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